mind lessons ... a year after nanay's death

there are many
many things that
would make your mind tick.
i choose to choose thinking
thinking than be bored.
i believed that many
many many people died
because of boredom,
because of sadness,
physically and some just died
even as they are still somehow alive.
but not too much thinking i say...
not from too much thinking.
those with migraine bouts should know
should know what i mean.
it may stress a soul too much.
too much one may choose boredom
choose boredom in the end---
that i know (i should!) but...
is not an easy sacrifice.

trust me, phobias can be funny sometimes

as i was on my way to the bank, i kept feeling unpleasantly agitated. i wondered what was causing it...minutes later, as i was about to ask for full stop (yes! i rode the public utility jeepney along espana, manila), i realized the fact that i will cross the street using the footbridge. i remembered that 'that' scares me a lot...i busied myself fighting the feeling off and thinking about phobias [coz that one definitely is a-'phobia' and i think this is some kind of ACROPHOPIA (fear of heights, physical of course)]. i still am on the process of processing this common phobia and one way i know is to somehow convince myself that one day, this phobia would just be a personal laughing matter to me.

surfing the net, i looked for phobias that is somewhat-basted-with-humor and Joe Cassidy @ http://www.c4vct.com/kym/humor/10phobia.htm gave me his list (see below). oh well, read on,  for both information and humor purposes ...

THE TOP TEN BEST PHOBIAS TO HAVE :)

10. Aichmophobia: The Fear of Pointed Objects
9. Anglophobia: The Fear of England and its Culture
8. Bogyphobia: The Fear of the Boogeyman

7. Electrogeniphobia: The Fear of urinating during an electrical storm.

6. Soceraphobia: The Fear of Parents-in-Law

5. Arachibutyrophobia: The Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth [ah yeah, that's sometimes sssss-scary]
4. Francophobia: The Fear of the French
3. Rhabdophobia: The Fear of being Beaten with a Stick
2. Politicophobia: The Fear or abnormal dislike of politicians [nyay]
1. Coulrophobia: The Fear of Clowns

THE TOP TEN WORSE PHOBIAS TO HAVE :)
10. Papaphobia: The Fear of the Pope
9. Xylophobia: The Fear of Wooden Objects [huh?]
8. Hellenologophobia: The Fear of Complex Scientific Terms and Greek Terminology [i so have this-amp!]
7. Porphyrophobia: The Fear of the color Purple

6. Gymnophobia: The Fear of Nudity
5. Ostraconophobia: The Fear of Shellfish
4. Stasiphobia: The Fear of Walking
3. Pantiphobia: The Fear of Everything [praning!]
2. Venustraphobia: The Fear of Beautiful Women
1. Eurotophobia: The Fear of Female Genitalia

my my my, what a funny list! but who knows, maybe one of you have one of these (?)... why don't we try work on our own list, i'd share you mine one day...but for now, i'd remember these - be it for word games or just for a laugh (or two).

bored at work? been there, been that (throwback 2010)

we all get our share of those days when we feel oh-so-bored at work...sometimes there's a cause for it (stressor-boss, dead-end job and the like), sometimes, it just happens, as if it's a part of an unending cycle. here are 5 of the things i did before to boot me out of the feeling, might (fingerscrossed) work for you too:

1. following the advise of a plurkfriend, i tried getting enough sunlight, fresh air, and exercise before work. i also did brisk-walking (pretending i'm about to miss someone or something if i don't rush) in-between work and people-watching (best place to do this is a university park) after work.

2. 'coz it cured my boredom in the past, i tried helping a friend's organization- planning learning sessions and activities for out-of-school youth. i also did encoding for a citizens group, and packing of relief goods (among others) after-work time til after midnight. yeah, it's selfishness(and selflessness altogether). you may also want to go out and pick up trash in your community (did this with my playmates when i was 10)- and get fun not from picking trash but from the look on the people's faces wondering what you're up to. that gave me something to think about (other than work) while at work, and something to look forward to too.

3. oh this one's a sure hit- visit the library (or if you can't go out during work hours, surf surf surf) and check out some weird books (i read witchcraft).

4. i did something new! i tried learning japanese (used a book) then french (used an audio-book) then mandarin (used a book again) then spanish (this i did online) then german (attended saturday classes). didn't succeed at all of it but it sure did steal some of those boring moments (hopelessly trying to translate curses in my head). i tried learning the sign language (something to do with my fingers during dull moments) - i ended up to only learning words that are in two songs used by my teacher...i also tried to learn how to dance the way bollywood stars do just with a compilation of music videos from india (spent a lot of time imagining and laughing at myself while working)- whew! fun!

5. i re-decorated my fugly room (again, something to occupy mind and look forward to)! with magazines and newspaper first then old CDs and post-its. but if you don't want to or afraid you might feel depressed instead of just bored afterwards, just exercise-pushing furniture this way and that.

yeah, those are my top 5 attempts...as i stated in the beginning, some worked (for most, only for a while) some didn't but hey, nothing's not worth trying :) if one of these works for you, tell me about it...but if none, you can tell me about it too, let's share a good laugh and go back to spending/stealing some time of boredom at work searching for a new job. (lol)

sharing. from depression to life, again.

my husband's mistress

LISA MARIE DEL ROSARIO, 25 years old, HRM graduate, working in Singapore for six years, went home [ ]. She has a long wavy hair, 5’5” in height, and a vital statistics of 34-25- 36. And so, their story goes. Lisa got [my husband's] number from a common friend. She had seen him twice and is willing to be his friend. Lisa is a liberated woman and has an Indian fiancé left in Singapore. She works in three hotels as a front desk supervisor. Living independently and temporarily staying with her Uncle’s family in [the city where we live], she’s afraid of commitment for having a sister in Dubai who is separated. The Hi’s and Hello’s started it all. Singapore and jobs in Singapore sustained their communication. Then as time passed, the commitment as text mates was established. From text mates to friends, they shared insights about family, their likes and dislikes, their weaknesses and experiences too...

Eventually, texting became less challenging and expensive so they both agreed to chat. Closeness became very evident. They became intimate friends endlessly sharing ‘anything’ under the sun. Too much familiarity is indeed boring. Cutting the story short, Lisa started it all. Fascinated with her, he also became interested. Loneliness yearns for comfort and for passion. And since they were both lonely (maybe), they found each other. They shared ‘everything’ (as in everything!) using the technology available; in bed, in the bathroom, and wherever their sinful imaginations could reach. Often, the last question both of them ask each other is: ‘HAPPY?’, with a big yes as an answer of course! Passionately, Lisa would always assure him that she would do everything to make him hers, exclusively hers alone. Because of that enduring happiness, the plan to meet personally was set aside.

One time, Lisa dared to call and listened to his moans and etc. Lisa couldn’t help it. The emotions were overwhelming (killing her!). It felt ecstatic yet burns like hell! It was fathomless. Uncovering the mouth piece, she asked softly: Happy? Finally, for the first time he heard her voice over the phone, a very familiar voice. He was suddenly offline. Lisa cried.

[ lisa?...] WAS ME!

[this is stolen with assumed permission

from my dear friend's blog http://chakchakchinagool.blogspot.com .

i don't know why i'm posting 3/4 of the article here.

(if you wanna know what happened next,

you better see the entire thing in her blogpage).

perhaps it's because this part gave me the creeps.

oh what a wife would do...and oh what a husband can do...

oh what loneliness or lust or love can do... dear heavens!]

i cant be sorry for who i am

oh eff! i don't even know who or what i am as a creature...one thing is for sure: i don't like it when someone says they know me so well or they speak of or write of me as if they have known me for a lifetime. where is this coming from? here--- i stumbled upon a poem and the poem hit me. usually poems hit me but this specific poem hit me as somebody who have not known me for long, believed he/she figured me out based on the fictional or not-so-fictional-whatever-that-is character i playfully projected and somehow ranted about it. why was i consumed by it? maybe because i wanted to cry foul 'coz when i playfully project one side of me to someone, its because i thought that someone is a more-advanced life form and wouldn't look at that side of me that way or...maybe, just maybe... i am loving the drama (we all do sometimes eh?) . oh well. :)

at a loss

it's been 3 weeks. still i can't build my ideas/framework/path to my exit paper. what's happening? i'm at a loss. inspiration, where are you? spark of genius, where are you? adrenaline rush, where are you?...ohm ohm ohm. i tell you, this will be a nonsensical entry. i have to let this out or else this will poison whatever sanity i have inside. four more papers for the various courses i foolishly took this semester. one major project for the german class. one overly-fundamental written exam for a core subject...and review review review for the five comprehensive exams to be taken at exactly the same date as my 33rd birth anniversary. those and the framework of my exit paper (they love to call it dissertation) ---> the cross-eyed bear. waaaahhhh!!! my escape? funny thoughts while supply lasts... see pictures. but yes, i must wake up and do start producing before it's too late. kill me- kill me quick!

jumbled-5 papers on the loose

so many thoughts in so little time, how will i manage? i have come across this article of fools in aquinas' analysis. i have thought it's a good read 'coz its not that common. imagine a discussion about fools and remedy for fooolishness (if any), i might end up remedying my own foolish-me :) then there's this paper that is due in a couple of weeks. i chose soul. why? well, why not? it's one of the biggest mysteries of humanity. on international economics, there's this debate paper on whether it is sensible to join economic (trade and/or financial) cooperation. my side is on the negative. my concentration is on globalization. the world is getting smaller. how will i prove otherwise? i'd also look into indonesia and it's labor policies. have i started going through it, to the moon and back yes! that? no! add up our problem sets and discussions on quantitative techniques...oh why oh why have i chosen this rugged thorny path when there's a simple life on the side. well, if i must sacrifice boredom - it's not an easy sacrifice.