remembering the roots (literally)

it's been days since i came to manila again...and as expected, separation anxiety sat in. it's hard to be far away from the places and the people you love especially when you are about to get used to it again.

together with being far again is the struggle- emotional, physical, intellectual, spiritual...financial. some light and easy, some too heavy to bear.

but on days like those, i just keep in mind the roots...the roots of the plants. observe them...look at those plants that you always water, their roots are thin and bundled, you can easily remove the plant with one hand from the soil...

meanwhile, those plants that you don't water much have roots that are bigger, somewhat unbundled and grow deeper into the soil...maybe that's what we need, that's what i need: a once in a while semi-drought.

typhoon ondoy damage --P 8.3 B only?

the philippine government must have underestimated the damage brought by ketsana (ondoy) at 8.3 billion pesos only. assad baunto, a calculater-thinker, believed it to be so. (thanks to nash for the CC copy of his thoughts and calculations).

using official statistical reports of various agencies, we can look at about 15 billion pesos, and that still excludes the foregone benefits and other social impacts. whew!

estimated number of filipinos affected by the september 26 flooding is about 3.9 million. the government's budget of 80 million pesos will translate to about 20 pesos per person. and they have served a little less than 1 million people, which, ahhhhmmm, he calculated to be about 80 pesos per person...sad sad sad.

the bulk of the help are coming from aids from relatives, friends and social networks. thanks god we have them...oh well, for now, we try to do the best we can, and help as much as we could...and pray pray pray ...for strength to start again and...healing.

annoying forum attendee

in a forum on climate change, makati city,
there is this forum attendee seated in the front row.
(we were seated in the next row)...this woman--
---answered a call from her cellular phone.
she talked quite loud, even laughed in between.
their phone conversation lasted for about 40 minutes,
just about the time spent by the speaker in the session.
afterwards, she guiltlessly said 'bye' to the person
on the other line, (i guess) not knowing that we are all irked!

trust issues

i came across lately of several people who are having issues on trust and trusting (and/or whether or not he/she can be trusted). it is a pity that this once beautiful world is now so filled with worries and distrust. it may have cropped up from bad experiences hence, lessons well-learned or better yet written as : lessons learned the hard way.

trust is a concept; a firm reliance on the integrity, ability, or character of a person or thing. once you loose trust, once trust is lost, it changes perception easily. it changes confidence, even character. it is a sad feeling when someone doesn't trust you, but it is an equally sad feeling when you can not put yourself to trust anyone. tsk tsk tsk. such lessons, such hard lessons.

and god gave me food :)

god is good...he never really lets me go hungry, god may have thought that it's better for me to keep my hips this way :)

friday - sir santi gave me a big box of bisquits.
saturday - nanay gave us banana chips and tuna in can
sunday - the excess for the taxi fare in bringing nanay to the airport was enough for veggies
monday - mam maricar and mam ligaya gave me bananas
tuesday - dr. ang gave me goldilocks mamon
wednesday - the excess for tita's electric bill was enough for my jamppong and skyflakes
thursday - i'm feeling lucky, tomorrow someone's gonna hand me yogurt icecream :)

hmmmm... thank you angels :)

my 'persian' night a month ago or so

---when i woke up this morning i remembered zahra, a classmate and a friend. she's been going through a lot these days, taking charge of their family's restaurants, taking care of her beautiful baby boy, helping her cousin who just gave birth and juggling all those with our tons of paper requirements in the post-grad studies...sometimes, i have the urge to go to her and ... help her in any way i can...

---remembering her also reminded me of my last visit at their restaurant one rainy night. i was just off from my other class when i got an sms from her- "when will you visit the restaurant?". i figured out it's been so long since i last told her that i will so i rushed my way to there...after some funny mishaps of the directions and all, i arrived few minutes before her, the place was almost heaven. far from the busy noise of the city but it's just in its heart (zaitoon is in leveriza-menlo sts). i saw charming smoke pipes! (the ambiance is real great especially for circle of friends who wants good food over good chit-chats). she arrived with her husband and the cutest baby boy.

---we chatted and tried to catch up with our lives (as if we haven't been texting every now and then). it felt good to see her so happy finally having her dream child in her embrace. she ordered what she long ago promised me - carrot shake with icecream on top! can you blame me for having my dessert first??? :) then i had soltani, best non-pork i ever tasted playing hide and seek with the spicy-tasty rice and red tomato halves. i was full in no time. whew!

---then the rain started pouring real hard on our every conversation, with the baby almost as if listening intently to our babbles. the slow pouring of rain at one point reminded me that i need to go back to my dormitory or else i'd swim my way there (happens all the time)...

i'd never forget the hearty meal-soltani...i'd never forget the yummy dessert-carrot shake...i'd never forget zaitoon...i'd never forget my friend (and her beautiful family)...i'd never forget that night.

you are a kite – fly high

made by mama’s skillful hands, you are formed beautifully. colored with love in each strand – inspired to fly, fly so free… fly high kite, fly and fly, to the heights, to the heavens. fly high kite, to the sky, discover your dreams – see new edens…go steady kite, in facing currents, balance, remember, is a friend. swing and dance even in torrents, to one side, to the other – to the end…

then as you fly, you see, you feel, the past, the now, the future. find some strength but be still. you are the one- be one with nature… and if your wings would ever wear, slowly come back, for a rest. ‘coz no wind can ever give you a tear. with dignity and pride – you passed the test!