Saturday, November 1, 2008

engaged???..available???


Is it because I am engaged that I have to be available? Is it because I am available that I have to be engaged? What spells engagement? Availability? Do I reach out to grow or do I grow to reach out?

Thesis: The being who is ready for anything is the opposite of him who is occupied or cluttered up with himself. He reaches out …beyond his narrow self, prepared to consecrate his being to a cause which is greater than he is but at the same time he makes his own. (G.Marcel, Engagement and Availability)

In the many aspects and dimensions of man’s struggle, one can not help but question the reasons for his existence. What is the purpose of learning, yearning, earning and unlearning? What makes a person a person? In this juncture, one may realize that life offers more questions rather than answers and somehow the questions are the answers in itself.

The world may come as an exercise book. You can choose to draw yourself as an individual, alone but not lonely. Your aloneness here may not last for vey long since man by nature seeks to learn and grow. What best way to learn and grow but to learn and grow with others in a community. But, just the same, you can choose to express reality or fantasy in your exercise book if you wish to do so. Fantasy or dreams however gives you an escape – the chance to pass events off as nothing and do other things. Responsibility for such is somehow vague and this may be coupled with questionable acceptance that others exist as persons too.

Reality as drawn brings others into shape. The concept that you are engaged to your own being, engaged to the existence of others, engaged as a part of the community. Here, you may gain or lose your individuality, but only always with your consent.
I used to look at myself as a star of a movie. Everything revolves around me (I am the sun in the solar system!). Whatever happens happens because it has something to do with me, either I may have caused it or it may cause me to somehow improve my character. Scenes function the same way as people in my movie. Either I will bring joy or havoc in their seeming insignificant lives or they’d bring changes in the way I play my part. It may go on like this for a while until a snap pulls me out of the movie in my mind.

The world indeed is bigger. Life can engulf an unprepared being. Gone should be the days of being too caught up with myself. Here comes the ‘me’ saying “I’m ready, I’m ready! Ready to face the world. Ready to meet people and learn. Ready to experience Ready to become an advanced life-form. I’m ready and available to be engaged – to life.”

1 comment:

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