musing vs mussing

i have been blog-hopping lately and was confused with the words 'musings' and 'mussings'...i thought they're almost the same so it's no big deal if one uses the one instead of the other. consulting the free dictionary (thank you internet) i sighed - dear me!!! they're amp, different!

here...

Musing as a noun - a calm, lengthy, intent consideration, reflection, rumination, thoughtfulness, contemplation, attentive consideration and meditation; as in  "after much musing, i decided to join the reunion"
 
As an adjective - deeply or seriously thoughtful; as in "the weird picture of a musing little boy";


 
and then here's the other word...
 
Muss as a noun - a state of confusion and disorderliness; as in "he smoothed the mussiness of the tablecloth"

As a verb - make messy or untidy; as in "i so hate his mussing my hair all the time"


is that so???  okay, now i know.

7 truths about love (bob ong)

"Gamitin ang puso para alagaan ang taong mahal mo.
Gamitin ang utak para alagaan ang sarili mo."

"Parang elevator lang yan eh, bakit mo pagsisiksikan ung sarili mo kung walang pwesto para sayo. Eh meron naman hagdan, ayaw mo lang pansinin."

"Pag may mahal ka at ayaw sayo, hayaan mo.
Malay mo sa mga susunod na araw ayaw mo na din sa kanya, naunahan ka lang."

"Hiwalayan na kung di ka na masaya.
Walang gamot sa tanga kundi pagkukusa."

"Pag hindi ka mahal ng mahal mo wag ka magreklamo.
Kasi may mga tao rin na di mo mahal pero mahal ka.. Kaya quits lang."

"Hindi lungkot o takot ang mahirap sa pag-iisa
kundi ang pagtanggap na sa bilyon-bilyong tao sa mundo,
wala man lang nakipaglaban upang makasama ka."

"Kung nagmahal ka ng taong di dapat at nasaktan ka, wag mong sisihin ang puso mo. Tumitibok lang yan para mag-supply ng dugo sa katawan mo. Ngayon, kung magaling ka sa anatomy at ang sisisihin mo naman ay ang hypothalamus mo na kumokontrol ng emotions mo, mali ka pa rin! Bakit? Utang na loob! Wag mong isisi sa body organs mo ang mga sama ng loob mo sa buhay! Tandaan mo: magiging masaya ka lang kung matututo kang tanggapin na hindi ang puso, utak, atay o bituka mo ang may kasalanan sa lahat ng nangyari sayo, kundi IKAW mismo!"

because life is short

...we shouldn't waste it by not multi-tasking

...we shouldn't shorten it more by surrendering to 'stresses'

...we shouldn't let it pass by without doing something good---

---for others, and most especially

---for ourselves.

because life is short, and... time is fleeting...aja! FIGHTING!

when equal IS NOT fair

you divide the electric bill by equal parts
so each of you (housemates) pays the same amount
regardless of the electric equipment used and the hours of usage.
bang! that's when 'equal' isn't fair!

you divide the day's allowance by equal parts
so each of you (siblings) gets the same amount
regardless of the fare and the physiological needs of each.
bang! that's when 'equal' isn't fair!

you give your students the same high grade (academic score)
so each of them gets to get good marks
regardless of their research output or efforts in class.
bang! that's when 'equal' isn't fair!

bang! bang! bang!

nothingness

It's nothing but a circle
and a cycle on and on and on and on
you - being born, you-living, you-loving, you-hurting
you-giving up or you- loving/living some more.
you are there, they can see
they can feel 'coz you are there...and then you're gone
you aren't there, they can't see
they can't feel 'coz you aren't there even if you know you still are there
you are gone, even if you are not
gone gone gone
and the cycle goes on and on and on and on
you, and that circle have become one or... nothing.
Ah, nirvana.

don't wake me up

Write everything...

Let it all out...

Fifteen years in the making,

the story in my mind...

No good use in pretending.

Happiness, at times

is an elusive dream...

Yet, you keep on dreaming

Yet, you keep believing...

one day soon

Those who have brains

will think

Those who have lips

will speak

Those who have hearts

will feel

Those who have hands

will work... for peace. 

For peace, in and out.

Write everything...

right now, or forever be shushed.

Let it all out or

it will blow off, inside.

Like fireworks.

Like fire that doesnt work.

Fifteen years in the making.

Happiness, at times

is a beautiful, wonderful dream.

But for now... let me 

let me not let go of the pains

let me not let go of life

let me not let go of the dream

Let me dream and

Let me write...everything.

Let me sleep.

Let me be...

Let it be.

and if it is not too much

not too much to ask...

please dont wake me up.

---when September ends

rape is not a laughing matter

People will never understand

the emotional pain of being raped.

Or still feeling dirty 22 years later.

Or blaming yourself because

you would think that you might

have done something to deserve it.

Or hating a particular scent because

your rapist commented that you smell good in it.

Or hating how you look like and even

calling it a curse because you thought

that it was the reason why you were sexually assaulted.

Or letting yourself go hoping that men

wouldn't find you attractive anymore.

Or the urge to leave everything behind

so the pain would just stop.

Only people who experienced the same violence

will ever understand it.

.

[M.Magallanes, Aug.31,2018]

.

#RapeIsNotAJoke #RapeIsNotALaughingMatter #StopVAWC

#BabaeAko #Respect #WomensRights #SexualHarassment

#RapeIsACrime #MayRespetoAngMgaBisaya #DiliKatawAnan

what's it all about?

what's it all about alfie? is it just for one moment we live? what's it all about when you sort it out alfie? are we meant to take more than we give or are we meant to be kind? if only fools are kind alfie, then i guess it is wise to be cruel. and if might belongs only to the strong alfie, what would you lend an old golden rule?

as sure as i believe there's a heaven above alfie, i know there's something much more - something even non-believers can believe in. i believe in love alfie, without true love we just exist alfie. until you find the love you missed, you're nothing alfie. when you walk let your heart lead the way, and you'll find love everyday, alfie, alfie.

yes my dear friends, those are the exact words in the song entitled ALFIE written by burt bacharach and hal david...immortalized by the film of the same title stars michael caine, and recently redone stars jude law. now you can start guessing why i so love the song...even its melody, so hearthbreakingly-soothing if there is such a thing. the irony of loving...of love.

one saturday of my life [tb080810]

i was terrified.
i don't know you.
you don't know me.
earth swallow me.
i was AMBITIOUS.
i better go around the world --
and take it from there.

sleeping was a challenge
this time i cried.
but yes, i'm fine.

goodbye march 2011.

what's with swimming [tb072710]

swimming has become wowa's  form of exercise. he started swimming as summer recreation course then he later shifted to advanced (more like competitive to me) course. reading about swimming, i found out that swimming (due to its low impact nature of the workout) is considered by many as a terrific exercise choice for not only healthy people, but also for those who face health challenges. wowa had recurring asthma attacks, since he started swimming regularly, we noticed that the frequency of attacks have went down a significant figure (2 in a month to 1 or even 0).

children like him enjoy the water (oh well, they were surrounded by water in our wombs for 9 months remember?). it provides gentle muscle training and  strengthens the heart and the lungs. and even if it is often an individual sport, kid swimmers can also join competitive swim teams (in gensan, they call the famous swim team -TORPEDO), making swimming a sport your kids can enjoy wether alone or as part of the team. and yes, not to overemphasize, wowa was somewhat overweight but since he found swimming to be a pleasure, he lost some of his baby fats without feeling weary and without compromising his diet.

but of course, parents should always be on guard and be aware of 'safety swimming' - give the kids proper coaching (lessons from a pro) to orient them on the swimming  gadgets (goggles, flippers, swim cap among others) and proper swimming techniques. parents too should be aware of the possible risks of swimming to kids like the possibility of an ear infection, (see related blogpost here-- http://sakura-withdrawalpangs.blogspot.com/2010/07/wishing-hed-say-goodbye-to-swimming.html ) which may be both painful and inconvenient to your swimming kid. this specific infection however may be treated with antibiotics and there are ways of preventing it such as the one given here --http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/childrens-health/CC00003 . so there you go. swimming may be one of the best options for kids' health and fitness there is, worked for my wowa.

ok ka lang mama??? [tb070110]

being a temporarily-miles-away mama, we have to content ourselves with calls and exchange of short messages (sms) using a mobile phone (cp)...in 2 years time, i noticed that as my wowa grew older, his smss have become way shorter as well...

lately,he has to bring the cp to school so he can contact his papa during break and dismissal time (to be fetched or to be assured that he would be fetched - he has become somewhat clingy these days).

here's a run-through of his cute - smss:

06/29/10 558pm   : thank you sa cellphone
06/29/10 830pm   : mama ok ka lang
06/29/10 852pm   : ok ka lang mama?
mama thank you talaga dito ha
06/29/10 903pm   : ma bakit hindi maka text
06/30/10 731am   : mama are you there
06/30/10 732am   : haha miss kita mama
06/30/10 815am   : mama ok ka lang
06/30/10 819am   : mama hug ko si lola
06/30/10 1159am : hello mama
06/30/10 1212pm : san ka banda mama
kay noynoy. panoorin ka namin. makita ka
07/01/10 542am  : ma nabigyan mo na ako load
07/01/10 955am  : ok ka lang jan mama
07/02/10 645am  : ok ka lang mama
07/02/10 738am  : mama ok ka lang jan

you noticed something too? hahaha.
ok nga lang ba ako? (am i really okay?)
as long as he will keep on wanting to know
if i am okay then i will be. :)

good byes are necessary for us to meet again

they are my friends, i talk and listen (read: read) to them almost every night, topics range from believing in myself to journeys of a confused to learning a thing or two about other culture...i depend on them when my mind is tired...when my heart is aching...when my body can not seem to take the pressures my mind and heart are subjecting themselves into. in short, they are my savior- my bedside books.

but there came a time that i used them as an escape, they send me far from where i am, and there i go hoping and wishing that i'd never go back to what i should be doing (reading-scholarly journals, writing-scholarly articles)... they are good friends, they shield me from hurts, they take me as far as i want them to, they hide me from my monsters and make me feel alright for a time. soon, i was seeing more of them than what is needed, i had to re-think and rethinking i did. hurting as it may seem, i tied them (all 25 of them- see list below) using my favorite red ribbon, placed them in  a good bag and had them sent to my old study area 2-hour plane ride away from where i am now.

i had to say goodbye to them...and yes, as the old savior's manual would say--- goodbyes are necessary for friends to meet again. i know i'd see them again. i'd be able to talk to them again. i'd have them beside me again, just ever-near when i need them. but for now, i had to let go of them so they won't be used as an escape- 'coz it's becoming unfair to them to be treated that way. goodbye dear friends.

jonathan livingston seagull - running from safety - illusions, the adventures of the reluctant messiah - a gift of wings - biplane - nothing by chance - one - bridge across forever - hypnotizing maria - the prophet - punchlines - loving each other - humor for a women's heart - the 12th angel - sula - eat pray love - stainless longganisa - silas marner - mr. blue - songs of solomon - oliver twist -  trivia of the silver screen - to kill a mockingbird - memoirs  of a geisha - best of a lady - robinson crusoe (audio)

june. fathers' day. what's that?

and so,
the father's day fever will soon die out.
on some occasions I wish I had one near...
but more often,
I see it (having none) as better
than having one who only teaches you
the meaning of broken promises,
shattered dreams even.
bitter as this may sound but
that's the truth
and that's the magic of acceptance.
in the end
I won't depend on anyone
to remind me that a good sense
(being sensible yet not overly sensitive)
will help me survive,
that being kind isn't synonymous
to being weak and
that my true boss is the Jewish carpenter...
and that I have to rest/sleep and
somehow be thankful
there's always something to live/look forward to...

shrek havin midlife crisis??? [tb051910]

the 4th installment in the shrek-franchise is a 'must-see'. while the movie is in-the-making, i was already cooking something on what the theme of the story will be (i, a self-confessed movie addict and yes- shrek fan). after almost a decade, one might ask, 'will this last installment attract audience for reasons apart from it being the last installment?' . that- i have found out yesterday... thanks to azrael, the prince-ever of manila bloggers (in the pic, he was with shrek on SM Imax).

4pm, 19th of may 2010, as eastwood mall unveils its 3d cinema, my much-awaited movie was screened specially for media (including bloggers) and VIPs. with shrek for photo-ops and a cocktail (both of which i was too sleepy to enjoy), i entered the room and stolen some minutes of sleep (read the alibi: i was mentally preparing for the show). crowds came in batches and with few messages (check out other blog entries for full coverage), we were asked to put our 3d glasses on and voila! shrek it is!

have you imagined puss lookin soft-and-fluffy like garfield? ... fiona acting like an amazona? ...donkey singing whitney's greatest love of all? enya's sail away on an seeming-imaginarium scene?...an ogre in an oliver twist material?...those and much much more suddenly came alive! right then i realized that it's not just shrek giving us laughs- it's shrek reminding us of our dear little problems of living such as the dreaded "midlife crisis". there is something very important that this animated movie is telling us: at times, you'd realize and only get to appreciate what you have  when it's gone.

i left the cinema with goodies (chocolates!),  fliers from sponsors and with a hazy vision of the philippine's first-sister kris aquino (winks) and her son james being interviewed. later in the evening, i overheard her saying (in a talk show) that she 'loved the movie so much'. don't take her word for it...even mine. shrek forever after will be shown worldwide and in philippine cinemas tomorrow (20th). see for yourself,  or better yet, see it with your spouse (or a special someone)- you'd know what i mean afterwards.

(pictures courtesy of azraelcodilla.com & poptower.com)

found this some-where...some-time... felt some-thing...some-how.

few lines from...

FRACTURES
by Cathy Denny

           

Hearts and souls heal slowly
Silently recalling fractures of long ago.
Weighing the risk of letting anyone know
What lies deep in his heart, what he's buried in his soul.

Patiently waiting for the one to help him see
How good it feels to set his heart free.
To trust her enough, and so completely,
He tells her those things he was once afraid she would see.

Mending his heart one fracture at a time.
As he comes closer to this I find;
Mending that fracture in his heart,
Is the key to mending mine.

[from http://www.exiledmothers.com/speaking_out/fractures.html]

RX for pain -MJ songs [tb041810]

like a comet blazin across the evening sky, gone too soon...
bestfriend matet sure knows how to break a heart when singing this MJ song. she also knows how to psychologically torture a friend in doing so...she is as calm as an ocean, but as deep too. she hangs on to MJ's song lyrics when she can't seem find the right words. we always say ---oh, (insert an MJ song here), that's your RX for your pain today.

matet (maria theresa) is the 3rd portion of the tres marias of MSU high school in the early 90's, i being the 1st (alfie maria) and kulot being the 2nd (mary anne). we have our own world. yes! apart from the rest of the class, from the rest of the school...sadness has been close as my next of kin, then happy came one day, chase my blues away...we lazy our days away by strumming guitar or just singing.

there were even days when we call a local TV station (showing old MTVs) alternately and request MJs songs the entire day. remembering was fun. singing then is great. but now we're apart (physically, that is). kulot is in gensan, busy trying to make ends meet. i am in manila busy trying to sort my priorities in life. matet is busy, chatting with MJ, i suppose (she died of liver cancer, yes, she too was gone. too soon.). we we're good students but most of all, we lived then-doing what we loved, loving what we do.

but with the songs and the memories, somehow it's enough... with a friend to call my own, i'd never be alone...it's when we were young and carefree and we lock the classroom door and dance 'dangerous' or 'beat it' as we laugh oh so loudly with our moves or those times when we choose a secluded spot in the campus and try to mimic MJ and paul mccartney in 'this girl is mine'...that damn gone girl is mine' ...matet left, our friend (we know he felt it from afar) MJ left too. but once in a while we gather in spirit, have our RX and go through the day renewed...we stopped existing and we started living...

you know what's making me feel sad now? it's kenny wizz- MJs impersonator from vegas. he will be visiting my hometown come may 2  and perform in memory of his hero (forever michael). if i was only near kulot and matet was only around, we will be the first to get our tickets and storm our way to lagao gym...i can see us laughing, dancing, singing and chatting our way as if we are the only people in the world. but then again, it wouldn't be possible. maybe, just maybe, there will be new 'tres marias' on that night...and like us, they will also get to see (or hear) our RX for pain - MJ songs.

i teach best what i most need to learn [tb091410]

on the 16th i'd be presenting my paper in a national conference. i have been teaching for 12 years now, but still i can't help but feel nervous everytime  i speak. others say they hardly notice my nerves when i speak---pft! that's because they can't feel me shivering and sweating, they don't see me vomitting the day and a couple of hours before, thay don't hear me asking the moon to take me or the earth to swallow me...

if i'd have the chance to talk to me today, here's my script:

stop those negative thoughts sakura! negative thoughts will kill whatever confidence you have left in that weird system of yours. what negative things you say to yourself, about yourself, inside your head is probably worse than anything else other people say to you. STOP! it doesn't help you thinking that way. STOP! those things in your head---they are not real! your audience are people too. they are just curious. if one is sarcastic, just think that he/she may have had a rough childhood/or may be having a midlife crisis. if one is irking you, smile and politely answer him/her what you know. you know more, you know better 'coz that's your work. goodluck and hey, if you come out alive afterwards (i'm sure you will), have an icecream and dance as if no one's watching...blah blah blah.

dancing for peace with my bestfriend of the 80s [tb092010]

manila began the celebration (in asia) for earthdance 2010- a global peace festival celebrated in over 500 locations in 80 countries. sept.18th, sun-down to sun-up, Earthdance Manila broadcasted to the world (live via EarthdanceTV) the hours of non-stop dance, music and live art. there were wellness and dance workshops, an eco-bazaar, showcase of indigenous rituals and healing ceremonies too. the event culminated with the Global Synchronized Prayer for Peace at 7am Manila   (4pm California - 8pm Sao Paulo - 12 midnight London - 9am Sydney)...[the whole world (of every race, and religion) prayed at the same time, that's good!]. bantayog ng mga bayani memorial center was the chosen venue (somehow to rekindle the fire of a nation united in its desire for peace, justice and democracy). themed “Embracing All Traditions,” artists of various genres from world music to techno, electronica, jazz, and hiphop fused their styles in jamming...

that night, i was reunited too with my bestfriend in elementary school- marlyn (she went there with her 15-year old son)...the three of us enjoyed the company and the beat as we ate our all-time favorite 'chippy' and as we danced along with the fire dancers, the participants from all over, the pangalay artists circle, and other traditional and ethnic dancers. it's a delightful collision of cultures, faiths, art forms, music and dance! kadangayan, nyko maca with DJ robby sanchez of peace pilipinas, and joey ayala head the stellar line up of performers (including tapati) and sponsor representatives like epi quizon for the dolphy aid. the event has become a convergence of advocacies too... SEARICE promoted their No2GMO with a free feast of eggplant dishes from all over the country; hare krishna demonstrated labor of love in its truest as they (pray and) chant while cooking vegetarian dishes to fire up the artists’ energy for the whole event, and, bagong lumad foundation, partners up for the ISAling Lahi Project- books and audio books of the various tribes and indigenous communities documenting their culture rooted in a deep connection with the environment through songs, stories, and values.  these, and many others were also made more fun-filled with free informal workshops in pangalay, poi dancing, belly dancing, and tribal drumming.

we went home just before midnight (cinderellas-in-the-making), bringing with us memories of the once-in-a-blue-moon event: the friendship reunion in a dance-for-peace drama. whew!

another tiring-yet-fun class-work [tb031210]

sunday, march 7th, we went to candaba pampanga. my professor, my classmates and I were excited to see what's in store. it was a fieldwork cum culinary tour in the making :).

the journey from manila to the site was great, seeing both rural and urban setting of the north side of the country. pampanga is not only famous for the bird sanctuary but also for the culinary expertise of the local folks.

we wasted not a moment of that one-day event. birds were fun to look at, so is the lake full of beautiful lotus flowers and lilies. snack was wow(bibingka, espasol, chicharon, buko drink). tilapia-fishing and duck-watching is an old-yet-ever-new-experience.

we were (I am) noisy as we rode the carabao cart at high noon, for 33 minutes. lunch- awesome (chicken souped in green mangoes, steamed veggies, grilled fish and lotsa fruits).

we learned a lot from our talks with the folks in the area: their living a simple life, their agricultural concerns, their trying to help each other via cooperative and their hopes of preserving their way of life but coping with the growth of the economy.

we went on our way back to manila but we had a freak-accident in baliuag area (that would be another story) so we stayed for a bit in one of my classmate's brother's house (very nice house). they were hospitable (served us icecream-yummy!). one stop-over in the best hotel-resort there is on bulacan (8waves) then to bed, exhausted yet smiling of the memories of our (mis)adventures.

love can seriously damage your health [tb2010]

yes, this is a movie. and i have seeen this movie for free. at instituto cervantes just 15-minute ride away from my cell. with my usual movie-fest buddy ate irene, we shared laughs...true, oh so true. there are times when love... can... seriously... damage... your... health.

here's the synopsis [thank you wikipedia]...Paris. King Juan Carlos I offers a diner at Hôtel Crillon. Diana (Ana Belén) meets Santi (Juanjo Puigcorbé) , an old lover, who now is the King's bodyguard.

They remember how they met each other, 30 years ago, in another hotel, inMadrid. Diana (Penélope Cruz) and Santi (Gabino Diego) met when The Beatles were going to play. He works in the hotel. She hides under John Lennon's bed because she's in love with the singer. But, what starts is an attraction between them. It is an impossible love because she wants to be rich and famous, and he is poor and has to join the Army. When they meet again as grown-ups, Diana has become a socialite, and Santi is a pilot. Both are married, but the love goes on... 

failed attempt in welcoming 2010

of welcoming 2010, of dengue and paranoia and of hypnotizing

it's been a while since i last updated this page...
but i intend to, hopefully today or within the week.
2009 went by and now another year to enjoy (life or something like it).
god is good. life is good. i am good. this is good.

flashback december 2009

yes...very soon, it's december once more...

5 memories lingered from last year's december...

(this is aside from the fun-time with my family in gensan of course)

here they are:

i proved that TGIF is really a must-try-resto...

i saw classmate tamrat wore their national costume

i was surprised when my classmate luella gave me ticket to this ballet show

i realized wrapping gifts in brown paper and ribonning it with straw is easier and practical...

i was showered with tokens...and gifts from friends

suddenly, i thought about respect and promotion :)

What is “respect”? What is “promotion’?... Affirmation fulfills the humanity of individuals and to affirm another means to respect and promote his subjectivity and individuality (his potentiality) and social capacities. "Respect and promotion may also involve active involvement in the prevention or demolition of conditions that prevent or hamper the unfolding of human capacities which are essential to the fullness of human development. "

Respect recognizes the existence of human qualities and capacities. This is something that the market economy can not just offer for a price. It comes as individuals relate with other individuals, as he strives to understand his being a human person, and as he tries to create a world with, and within the world of others.

Man’s needs in the beginning used to be so simple – flood, clothes and a shelter just enough to protect him from heat and cold. As time passed however, these needs have grown and have extended to items tagged as wants. Men began looking at other things. He also then began realizing that there is more to the basic economic needs. Whatever needs and wants men might have, whatever it may cost, one can not deny that without the feeling of being human in its fullest sense, the individual is only ‘potentially human’. The need to for affirmation of his humanity by others will fully actualize his humanity despite the scarcity of resources, goods and services that he is facing.

A child learns to appreciate affirmation from his parents and from the individuals that surround him every day of his life. He learns to acknowledge his being by hearing what others think or say of him, and whatever makes others think or say positive, he does over and over. This is a manifestation of man’s need for affirmation at an early age. This need continues to be there as he grows old. The feeling of affirmation coupled with provisions of basic necessities will somehow provide the child the main ingredient to full life. A life that teaches him to affirm others of their existence, and, humanity too.

Respect as felt, (and not to overemphasize- earned) includes respect for intelligence. It also implies that intelligence must be developed to the fullest. Promotion is the commitment to create conditions for development and growth so potentials (including one of intelligence) are realized ---a movement from potentiality to actuality. Respect and promotion are essential demands of man from childhood to adulthood. Circumstances that may hamper both must be prevented or demolished.

It is human nature to be affirmed and accepted as human persons and anyone refused of such is de-humanized. (hmmm...thoughts...)

cancel my subscription

cancel my subscription

---

i don't need your issues.

this is the print of one of my favorite shirts.

i wish i had them on now.

sometimes irritating people are just

too much to deal with.

a pain in the neck!
---

but then again,
i have to remember that no one (nothing)
can make me feel bad/mad/sad without
my permission.
so. to hell with them (that)!